T-Shirt Shame

As a pre-teen during summer holiday, I was obsessed with watching the TV show "Too Close For Comfort," which I deeply hated (JM J. Bullock was supposed to be straight...I mean really, that was just too much to ask in terms of suspension of disbelief) but which I felt compelled to watch every day at 12:30 pm. Ted Knight, who played Henry the father, always wore a sweat shirt from an American university. A different University every episode. In an interview during the mid-80s he said it was because he never graduated from college, which he always regretted, and this was his way of paying respect to all the great universities.

Charles, my childhood best friend, also wore a sweat shirt around this time that announced his allegiance to Harvard, which his father had attended, and which he and I used to fight over who would actually end up going there. I think we may have even had a ten dollar bet going. I secretly wanted the Harvard shirt, but made a conscious decision that I would NEVER wear a college shirt...that I was too cool to be a walking billboard for a University.

At BYU I sneered at the students who wore the BYU cougar shirts. "Stupid out of towners," I thought, "BYU is so stupid..." and then I would put on my "That Slut Girl" shirt that had a great cartoon of a girl with cleavage and a 60s flip smoking a cigarette and looking deliciously bitchy.

Even when I started working at Harvard (yeah, so neither Charles nor I actually went to Harvard, but I think I still win our 5th grade bet--Charles, if you're out there I want my ten dollars!), I looked at all the undergraduates and would sneer, "silly spoiled brats whose mommies and daddies make a billion dollars and can actually send them to this stupid ivy league school...I'd never wear a stupid college shirt." But that didn't stop me from buying Harvard t-shirts for all of my nieces and nephews one Christmas...

Last night I was helping my friends Josh and Mollye on some design work for a film project they are working on. It got to be late and I was exhausted after a very long day at school and I ended up sleeping on their couch. Now this would have been fine, only I had an appointment at 9 am on campus and I didn't wake up until 8:30, which did not give me time to go home and change my clothes (I had to brush my teeth with my finger and baking soda...) and because I have a busy day today, I won't make it home until tonight. And I hate wearing the same clothes twice. And there are no clothes stores near Columbia.

I suppose you know where I am going with this.

Yes, today I actually bit the bullet and bought a Columbia shirt. It's cute. It's black with white stitching. It's fitted and makes me look hot...but across my boobs, it definitely says Columbia.

I have become what I hate.

And I sort of like it.

The oddness of school

I have 21 credits this semester. Full time is considered anything over 12 credits. Needless to say, I have a busy schedule. But, unlike being an undergraduate, there are no grades, just pass/fail classes. And this makes it a lot easier to worry about making interesting films rather than worrying about merely grade grubing.

I also have an acting class. It's called Directing the Actor, only for the first 9 weeks, we ARE the actors. I've never been very good at memorizing lines and this class has been hard because I have to memorize AND block scenes. Last week I was assigned a scene from David Hare's Plenty. In it, the main character asks a man she hardly knows to impregnant her so she can be a single mother. I was totally fine with this in concept, until I actually read the scene (five pages is freaking me out...how do people memorize whole plays anyway?) and realized I am going to have to kiss one of my classmates that I hardly know! Eeek!

This week I am also shooting my first film exercise. You should all be forewarned that if you come to visit me any time soon I will force you to be in my films!

Note to Self...Things to Not Repeat Living in NYC

1. Walking alone in Morningside Park after dark. I actually watched a couple of junkies shooting up in the park earlier today. It is quite a lovely park, but not so good at night.
2. Riding my bike home at night without a helmet or a light.
3. Wandering the side streets alone in Harlem after midnight.
4. Eating at any establishment that has the word "fried" more than three times on the awning "Fried Chicken, Hamburgers, Fried Cheese, Fried Okra, Mac n Cheese."
5. Telling the corner grocer that I am not married.
6. Stepping on the betting money of the seven guys who continually play dice outside of my house.
7. Calling my professor a "poopface" and having them overhear.
8. Hmmm....I am sure there are more...

Starting school in NYC

I finally have an apartment! I am living in West Harlem in a 2nd floor flat with two girls who are a year ahead of me in the film program at Columbia. It is a recently refurbished building with hardwoods and decent light and a mere four long blocks walk to Columbia. Email me if you want the new address to send me hundreds of dollars (or to send me a nice postcard)!

I like Harlem. One of the difficulties of New York is that it feels like such a rat race, like you must wear the best clothes and know the right places to brunch and be intimately familiar with all the “cool” neighborhoods. And there is only so much of that that I can do without feeling utterly exhausted. But Harlem feels like a community. Like a neighborhood. So many people have lived here for years. People say hello and good morning on the street. If I walk around the neighborhood in jeans, flip flops and a hoodie no one really cares. You can buy a can of soda for 50¢ and get an egg sandwich for $1.50. Rent in New York City is still outrageous, but at least I’ll be able to afford to eat. Plus, I’m only nine short blocks from Central Park, where I walk almost every day and heed the advice of my friend John who said, “find the green spaces in Manhattan, they will keep you sane.”

School started this week. Not real school mind you, but orientation that involved everyone in my program getting into small groups and making a short film. My film involved me sitting in a public toilet for three hours. If this is what the rest of grad school is going to be like, I can’t wait!